New Website

Dear Visitors,

Update your bookmarks because Cool Mum Super Dad has moved on to its own hosted site at http://coolmumsuperdad.com/!

All the content from this blog are currently being transferred to the new site. This blog shall no longer be updated but will be kept open.

Sibling Rivalry

Sibling rivalry has far-reaching consequences in our lives!

Jamilah will talk on Sibling Rivalry on Friday, 20th March 2009 from 3pm till 4pm at bfm89.9 (business station).

She will highlight how parents' attitudes (what they say and do) can create conditions which can diffuse sibling rivalry or make it worse.

"Where Can I Get COOL MUM SUPER DAD?"

Some people have complained to me that they can't find my book Cool Mum Super Dad and/or its Malay version Ibu Kool Bapa Hebat. Technically speaking, both books should be on the shelves of all major bookstores.

If you face the same problem, you may write to me at jamilah.samian@gmail.com for an online order. Postage is free.

Highly Sensitive Children

Jamilah will be on air (radio station bfm89.9) on FRIDAY, 6th of March 2009 from 3pm till 4pm to talk about Highly Sensitive Children (HSCs).

Specifically, she will discuss

- what the term "Highly Sensitive Children" means and how to recognise if your kid is one
- how HSCs are different from nonHSCs
- what parents / caregivers / teachers can do to help unleash the hidden potentials of HSCs.

Confirmed Public Programmes

Jamilah will be giving FREE public talks as follows:

1) Parenting Talk: Cool Mum Super Dad
Venue: Tunku Abdul Rahman College (TARC)
Time: 6.30 pm - 8 pm
Day / Date: Thursday, 26th March 2009

2) Parenting Talk: Teens & Sex
Venue: Universiti Tunku Abdul Rahman (UTAR), PJ campus
Time: 9.45 am - 12 noon
Day / Date: Saturday, 16th May 2009

3) Title: Work Life Balance
Venue: Tunku Abdul Rahman College (TARC)
Time: 6.30 pm - 8pm
Day / Date: Thursday, 28th May 2009.
(co-speaker: Ahmad Fakhri Hamzah)

To register, please call any of the respective numbers listed in the flyers.

To register for the talk on 26th March 2009, please refer to the contact details stated in the flyer for TARC.

To enlarge any of the flyers, click on the image once.

Flyer for Parenting Talk: TEENS & SEX at UTAR, PJ.
Date: 16th May 2009.

Flyer for Work Life Balance Talk at TARC.
Date: 28 May 2009.

Thank you.

Why Kids Misbehave

To listen to Jamilah's interview at bfm89.9 on WHY KIDS MISBEHAVE, check out the podcasts below:

Are You Struggling To Be A Cool Mum Super Dad? You Are Not Alone!

Why Your Child Is Misbehaving And How To Get Them To Behave Better.   

Radio Show on "Why Kids Misbehave"

Jamilah will be on air (new radio station bfm89.9) on Friday, 13th February 2009 @ 3 pm till 3.30 pm to talk about "Why Kids Misbehave" and what parents can do to deal with it better.

Tune in for a lively and engaging discussion!

Toastmasters: Overindulgence is Good for a Change

by Jamilah Samian

Can you overindulge in gastrointestinal delights and devour every bit of tasty morsel in a multicourse meal and still remain as healthy as ever? Yes, you can.

How do you go on a food binge that lasts for three straight hours and not gain an ounce of fat? That's exactly what the second meeting for MIM Toastmasters 2009 was all about.

Fine dining began at 9.30 am sharp, with Toastmaster K. Geetha dishing up the Appetizer to tickle everyone’s taste buds with a simple invocation. Then came Chef d’ Meeting, Advanced Communicator Silver (ACS) Ahmad Fakhri Hamzah, aptly dressed as a chef from head to toe. Ahmad caught everyone off guard when he struck the top of the rostrum with a ladle. The standard gavel had been put on hold for a day. Ahmad talked about how Dr Ralph C. Smedley, Toastmasters International founder, concocted a recipe on how to be a good speaker at the basement of an apartment in Santa Ana, California in 1924.

Move aside, gavel. Here comes the ladle.

Next up was Restaurateur Lee Sai Keong, Acting President. Instead of delivering the usual Presidential Address, Sai Keong asked each member of the audience to respond to the question: "Do we EAT TO LIVE or LIVE TO EAT?"

The audience then feasted on a delectable round of table topics whipped up by Toastmaster Alia Nadhirah Ahmad Fakhri who, with an apron smartly tied to her waist, was Maitre d' Table Topic. True to the occasion, Alia came up with dainty ideas to go with the flow: "The best dish you ever made", "You're a waiter at a restaurant and the customer says, 'There's a fly in my soup!' How do you react?", and "The best meal I ever had."

The Entertainer of the Day, Daniel Teh, had the audience in stitches with his down-to-earth humour before the 20-minute coffee break, when those present helped themselves to aromatic nasi lemak plus a healthy dose of networking and fellowship.

For the main entree, three main courses were served:
- Chef de Cuisine Anne Yuen presented Menu No. 6 from the Advanced Communication & Leadership (AC&L) Manual.
- Chef de Cuisine S. Krishnan did Menu No. 8 from the Communication & Leadership (C&L) Manual.
- Chef de Cuisine Jamilah Samian did Menu No. 3 from AC&L. Jamilah was voted Best Project Speech Speaker of the Day with her speech entitled "Cost of a Miracle."

(L-R) Past President Mark Ho, TM Lee Chor Kee, ACS Ahmad Fakhri, Vice-President (Education) Lee Sai Keong, CC Jamilah Samian, CC Richard Hoy, ATMB Abu Bakar Bapoo

The Cuisine Critics, Word Nutritionist, BAHtender, Time Inspector and Chief Chef all had their say in the end. What a great way to end a sumptuous meal!

"This meeting was an experiment," Ahmad says. "I wanted to do something out of the ordinary. I thought: Why not create a unique atmosphere, say, once a quarter, to spice things up?"

The idea to set up a restaurant setting for a meeting had been percolating in his mind for months and took several days of research. "I looked up some of the terms frequently used in the culinary world and coined the rest. You can do it with a fair amount of creativity."

With his role as Chef d' Meeting (Toastmaster of the Day), Ahmad accomplished a Specialty Project and is one step closer to becoming an Advanced Communicator Gold.

"I began with the end in mind: Enrichment of vocabulary, being able to move beyond our comfort zone and dabbling with unfamiliar territory. I wanted the audience to use as many senses as possible in brewing words and phrases that evoke emotions, sights and smells peculiar to the culinary realm," he says. "It's in line with the theme of the day: CULINARY ARTS."

"It's also to tie in with Chinese New Year, when gastronomy is an important element in enhancing friendship and amity among family and friends," he says. "It's food for thought for other Toastmasters clubs. If you find the usual Toastmasters meeting becoming a tad too mundane, it's worthwhile to cook up something fresh and engaging."

Prior to the meeting, the audience was given a list of phrases and words they were encouraged to use like "spice up", "digest the message", and "garnish."

The guests found it stimulating, too. "It was a success because of the preparation," says Daniel Teh, who doubled up as Chief Chef (General Evaluator).

What's next?

"We'll see if we can come up with Law & Order, ER (Emergency Room), and The Art of War," says Ahmad.

What a Reunion!

Catching up with your former schoolmates is invigorating for the soul, I learnt today.

I remember the first email I received from Dr Noral, now at the Institute of Medical Research (IMR). She used to sit just in front of me in class. "Do you remember me?" she wrote via Facebook. Of course I do! You don't forget people you grow up with that easily.

That sparked off a search for other schoolmates and over the course of just several days, things swirled into a frenzy. Emails flew from as far as Canada and criss-crossed the globe and before we knew it, the date was set ... 31st January in Putrajaya! How lovely it was to see June, Mani, Baya, Rosnah, Masita, Masjuniyati, and Nora, to mention a few. Never mind widening waistlines. The bright smiles and toothy grins brought back fond memories among bosom buddies in a flash, though it wasn't quite total recall for some.

It's a kind of closure, after all these years of wondering what had happened to everyone ... and NOBODY could care less about how many titles or degrees others had. Such a simple reunion; potluck for that matter, yet I had a blast. And to think all this while I thought I was the only nostalgic person around ... Boy (errr ... I mean, girl), am I glad I was wrong!

Several of the girls brought pictures of our schooldays ... it was a good walk down memory lane. Still, it's sad to learn that a few had passed on due to natural illnesses and other causes. I, on the other hand, did not have any pictures to share; I must have misplaced them as I have moved so many times after secondary school. It's also good to know that everyone is doing well. A few are keeping real busy with family (like me), others are medical specialists, lawyers, teachers and businesswomen ... I feel so proud of ALL of them!

Just before we left for Putrajaya, Fakhri said, "Why don't you bring some of your books?" I was aghast at the thought. Bring my books? This isn't a business meeting! "Honestly," he said, "I think they would love to see it."

Well, I did put some in the car boot ... and forgot all about it, until someone asked me. "Didn't you bring any?" she asked.

In the end, there wasn't enough to go around and I promised to send the books by snail mail.

Last I heard before I left, another reunion is in the cards.

Next Book on TEEN Boys ... Out in May 2009!

Just heard from my publisher today that they're keen to publish my next book.

Targeted date of completion: Mid 2009, God willing. Anytime sooner is a bonus.

It's kind of a sequel to my first book, COOL MUM SUPER DAD, but this time I'm focusing on TEEN BOYS.

The book is an ideal read if you have a tween (10 plus to 12) or a teen (12 plus to 19) son.

Can't wait to see the book in print and hold it in my hand ... Have been working on it for sooo long. Put my heart and soul into writing it.

To everyone who has been enquiring and wondering ... thank you for all your support and prayers.

Second Book Coming Up!

Phew! Finally, I'm almost finished with revising the draft for my second book ... yet again. Just have one more section to complete. This time, after I got feedback from an editor. I have lost count how many times I have revised the copy. I don't know about other authors. For me, it's a l-o-n-g process of writing, putting it into the cold, followed by rewriting. Many times, that is. Sometimes I go to bed at night wondering if the book will ever get published. Yet I will wake up each morning convinced that it will!

As Paulo Coelho said, "When a person truly desires something, the whole universe conspires to help that person realise his dream."

Wishful thinking in difficult times like this? I think not. Good times or bad times, it's always those who have faith in themselves who succeed.

Anyway, a tip for aspiring writers:

Some time ago I stumbled upon a book by Sol Stein entitled "Stein on Writing". It's a lovely read and worth your time. Doesn't matter if you do fiction or non-fiction. Stein has done both. In fact, one thing I learnt from him was that you could do both equally well. I used to think if you're into non-fiction, you can't shine in fiction and vice-versa. Glad to discover I was wrong!

AmBank Toastmasters

Last Thursday evening, Ahmad Fakhri and I fulfilled a commitment we made some months ago to support AmBank Toastmasters Club. Great to catch up with Mah Foong Hoh, Jean Soong and Kala among others. As Chinese New Year (non-religious celebration) was just round the corner, the Sargeant-at-Arms had the whole place donned accordingly. Everything was red (a Chinese friend once remarked "The redder the better") and everyone received an orange as a door gift. How sweet! Miss President (Jean) even taught us some Mandarin and Cantonese greetings ... "SAN LAI FAI LOCK" and "SIN LIEN KWAI LUR". I do hope I got that right...

As the Grammarian, I asked the audience if they had watched Mulan. Some did. There was a particular scene I remember in the movie, in which the Emperor of China said, "A single grain of rice can tip the scale". What has this got to do with Toastmastering? Just as a single grain of rice can tip the scale, so does a single word can make or break your speech. This is not an exaggeration. Think about it. When you string words together, you get a sentence. Join these sentences, you get a paragraph ... and eventually, a speech. It's the quality of each word you use that makes all the difference.

Having said that, grammar is just one part of giving a speech. If you're not confident of your grammar skills, not to worry too much. The more you are anxious about getting it right, the more you stumble on the words. But if you are willing to take the risk of making mistakes in front of others (provided you're prepared), you have nothing to fear. Everyone can and will go as far as he or she is willing to work for!